JOKE OFTODAY

NIGERIA….MY BELOVED COUNTRY.
• Where our mothers use ice cream bowls to store pepper in the fridge
• Where ladies don’t accept flowers for valentine or birthday.
• Where lizard go look ur eyeball, node head say “notin dey happen guy”
• Where a blind beggar will reject a fake nairanote.
• Where Groundnuts are sold in BOTTLES and WATER is sold in SATCHETS.
• Where parents claim they were always first position in school.
• Where You Can Be A Driver For Years Without A ‘DRIVER’s LICENCE’
• Where government officials don’t know the national anthem.
•Where Gala and Lacasera are d best options wen stuck in traffic.

• Where we fight for everything. To gain admission to university, to get a job and worse still to enter a bus!
• Where u are robbed of your phone and the robbers come back for ur Pin code n charger.
• Where ur type of GENERATOR shows how RICH you are.
• Where you can easily blame your family members in the village for your problems.
• Where rich men must have pot belly.
• WHERE IF U DO ANYHOW U GO SEE ANYHOW.
• Where generator is a social amenity.
• Where people dey collect change for beggar hand.
• Where igbo men produce Toyota camry jeans and Dr’dre slippers
• Where the man who had no shoes is the president.
•Where bb torch is sold in traffic for N5k!!!!
• Where you are jailed for stealing Maggi and given a chieftancy title for stealing millions.
           ENGLISH EXAM(JAMB)
I was a candidate at a JAMB Examination. We were writing Use Of English. I shaded the ones I knew and was waiting for manner to fall from Heaven when I noticed a very beautiful girl sitting beside me.
She was shading and was not looking up. Through the help of my long neck, I peeped and checked her work, she was on number 65, I was still on number 21 and time was running out. I quickly thanked God and started shading along with her.
We got to number 98 together, suddenly, she looked up, caught me and shouted in a low tone, “What is it? Why is you dey copying me? Copys! copys! You is not shaming! As big as you are! You are a disgrace to your manhood!
Na so I shout “Heeeey! heeeeyyy!!! I am finished!, who has eraser!!!